Loser

Deadass the day that was now in the past, Was Azidula's Bday (Throwback nickname though). I wanted to call her...But chose not to. Wanted to text her...I didnt...I wanted to send her a FB message...I Passed. Too many thoughts and past memories associated with all of that, I would assume this is my way of saying "Happy bday" or maybe "Happy belated". Either which way, I was trying to wait on more of a reason to try and hold off on doing this blog. For the fact of after this I'll be at the intro, I'll be Reintroducing myself. Maybe not, then again I dunno. I've been thinking alot of the...I was bout to say the last "2" women in my life, then I'd be lying. But the for those who know me know which 2 I'd be speaking of.


Also I've like really been thinking, more so trying to not contend the thoughts of the child that could've been. Knowingly it is still a sensitive topic, even after knowing that if the child (Boy/Girl Pref. Girl)would've been born. 9 out of 10 it probably would've been less likely mines, Now that I feel sorta comfy enough to divulge such sensitive information. I still dwell on that every fucking day, not that it is to be cared for by you the reader (Whoever the fuck you are). I mean there are reasons I did write this blog, Then they are not. Though who is to argue?

(As Continued On 7/23/10)

Like Deadass though, I had a great day. I got to go on a field trip to the Detroit "Diamond Jack (Or Belle)" Whichever the fucking name of it is, I got to chaperon both my babes Alicia and Kobes. Also one of Kobe's Classmate Deyshawn, He was very reminding of myself at 5. Chipper lil duder, fun loving yet I watched him say "what up" to most of the kids. Yet he seemed, alil self-reserved. You know...one of those kids who learned how to entertain themselves when not interacting with other children. Yah mean? I would really love to make this blog longer, but I havent really been feeling like blogging. Let alone touching on some of the topics I touched on, but hey it is what it is. I visited some things on FB as far as my past FB Status' and Check'em Out below. I still feel some type of way...


"Sincere Ray Is Silently Cryin His Eye Balls Out, On Mothers Day I Wish I Could've Been Holding Her And Crying Into Her Arms (She's Only Like 5'5" Or So) Only Because Of What Could've Been Never Happened After She Talked Me Into Being Honestly Being @ Parent Teacher Nite And I'm not the Kid Get It?" (May 10th 2009)

"Sincere Ray Is Off On Some New Shit....Like Mentally Rocked...Stability Lost...Why I'd Have To See That...R.I.P. Mary Dial...You Are Loved And A Blessing To Me More Than Personally"(May 24th 2009)

"Feelin better, i am still high off love while in love. Your dig? I hope mrs ray still feels equally the same" (December 11th 2009)


Music...Told Me She Loved Me, She's My Baby...My Supersonic Baby...