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Good morning,I am @ that Holiday home 2 minutes 2 far away, It should not be hard to understand that. I did not get much sleep, typically a regular thing for me not to get much sleep now a days. Ty had told me to read Ajene's blog, though I am a follower I could not bring myself to go look at it. Hell it showed up on my dashboard, I just over looked it. Any and everything that has something remotely close to Ajene simply makes my heart drop and I get tense, Why? I will say for one a reason, I never lied when I told her my heart was hers. Given the my blogs go un-answered and most likely unread, I just wonder a lot of things. I can sit here an continue to scream about wanting her & "Us" back til my face is black and blue, I am not too far from believing it will not happen. One more thing I stay wondering is the conversations I had with Quiggles gets back to her, I hope it does since she refuses to talk to me. So that's another set of shots in the dark or loud cry's on deaf ears, I swear if we had the chance to spend one last evening together in person and actually talk without her clamming up. I believe a lot of things could be cleared up, then again its less likely I'm under the impression she wants nothing to do with me. While I want something if not everything to do with her, like seriously if I could explain how I really do miss her and would like to discuss the things I've been going through. Would make me feel a lot better,I guess this is what happens when life under the scope is broken and scrapped. I do not think she believes how hurt I am, then again I've kind of never really asked her about her feelings. Though I want for her to lay on my chest and talk to me like we used to, maybe bite me (If your reading this I hope you know what I am talking of you back biter). Anywhom I do not know how to reverse the feelings and love I have for her, then again I honestly do not want to do so. Anywhom it's almost 8am I got a long walk ahead of me, being out of luck and faith is like being broke and house broken. Wild aint it?
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I just want a tad bit of peace, With you...Loving me was never easy, Loving you was beyond easy and made me want to keep that love. Maybe you dont get, or if you reading maybe you do...And I just like to say that you dont.
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